God In Our Grittiness

I never thought the moment I stepped through the front door of 825 Savage Drive my life would be changed. The house needed a lot of work; a lot more than we had ever realized. The bathroom had a thin layer of two-week-abandonment filth, the carpets had a few rather questionable stains, and the refrigerator was enveloped with hardened spills; and we were the lucky ones who were left to scour it all away. My housemate, Kristin and I moved into our rental home in the scorching heat of a Texas July. Our cars were packed with everything we owned. Progressively, we managed to carry it all into our house and to their temporary resting places. Kristin set up an air mattress for herself in the living room and I was quick to follow. I pulled out my eight-dollar air mattress I bought a few days earlier from Target, which oddly resembled a swimming pool raft. We laid them side-by-side. I grabbed the air pump and swiftly reached for the mattress. I paused. The plug to the air mattress was unaccounted for. Great! I now had to sleep on the foul-smelling carpet. When the day of cleaning finally settled down, we grabbed a movie and camped out on Kristin’s bed, completely happy. It was in that moment I finally understood God’s love for us when we are broken and unclean. We often times only show the cleanliness of our lives and resist letting the Lord get down to the grittiness because we are afraid of the work we will have to do. Instead of trusting the Lord with our mess, we avoid it and are dishonest with ourselves, denying our true reliance on Him. He is joyful when it comes to our brokenness. He desires to wash us clean and give us new life, we just have to be willing to endure the honesty, pain, and trust it takes to get there.